How Do Muslims Get Married? ~ Hi readers! In several previous articles, I have explained some important things about marriage according to Islam, basic things about marriage, types of marriage, wedding parties, halal marriages, differences of opinion on the law of marriage, and so on. As Muslims, we must know that. In this article I will explain another important point about marriage; how do Muslims get married?
If you ask about how Muslims get married? Then, you will find many answers. The answers will appear in accordance with the things that must be considered in relation to a legal marriage according to Islam. In short, the most appropriate answer to this question, in my opinion, is that they must marry according to Islamic teachings.
I personally admit that the answer is still very general. But we can focus on some more specific questions and answers.
If you ask, how do Muslims get married? So, the answer is that they must know that getting married is not an obligation. In Islam, marriage is a highly recommended recommendation. We can find this explanation in the hadith below.
Hadith About Marriage
The hadith about marriage that I mean is as follows:
عَنِ ابْنِ مَسْعُوْدٍ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ : قَالَ لَنَا رَسُوْلُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ : يَا مَعْشَرَ الشَّبَابِ مَنْ اِسْتَطَاعَ مِنْكُمْ الْبَاءَةَ فَلْيَتَزَوَّجْ , فَإِنَّهُ أَغَضُّ لِلْبَصَرِ وَأَحْصَنُ لِلْفَرْجِ , وَمَنْ لَمْ يَسْتَطِعْ فَعَلَيْهِ بِالصَّوْمِ فَإِنَّهُ لَهُ وِجَاءٌ
From Ibn Mas’ud radliyallahu anhu, he said,” The messenger of Allah sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said to us, “O young people, anyone of you who can have sex, then he must get married. Indeed it (marriage) is better able to keep eye sight and better able to maintain vital organs. Anyone who can’t, then he must fast because it actually suppresses the desire to have sex.”
If you ask, how do Muslims get married? So, the answer is that they have to make sure that the marriage they are going to do is a marriage that is allowed in Islam; their marriage was not an ash-Shighar marriage and a contract marriage (Mut’ah marriage). We can find an explanation that these two types of marriage are strictly prohibited in Islam in the hadith below;
عَنْ نَافِعٍ عَنْ ابْنِ عُمَرٍ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُمَا قَالَ : نَهَى رَسُوْلُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَنِ الشِّغَارِ
From Nafi’ from Ibn Umar radliyallahu anhuma, he (Ibn Umar) said, “The Messenger of Allah sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam has forbidden the marriage of ash-Shighar.”
عَنْ سَلَمَةَ بْنِ الْأَكْوَعَ رَضِيَ اللهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ : رَخَّصَ رَسُوْلُ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ عَامَ أَوْطَاسٍ فِيْ الْمُتْعَةِ ثَلَاثَةَ أَيَّامٍ ثُمَّ نَهَى عَنْهَا . أَخْرَجَهُ مُسْلِمٌ
From Salamah ibn al-Akwa’ radliyallahu anhu, he said, “The Messenger of Allah sallallahu alaihi wa sallam never allowed the marriage of Mutah for three days in the year of the Authas war. Then he forbade it.” The hadith is narrated by Muslim.
If you ask, how do Muslims get married? So, the answer is that they have to make sure that the people they are going to marry are not people who are forbidden to marry. We can find an explanation of all of this in the Quranic verses below;
حُرِّمَتۡ عَلَيۡكُمۡ أُمَّهَٰتُكُمۡ وَبَنَاتُكُمۡ وَأَخَوَٰتُكُمۡ وَعَمَّٰتُكُمۡ وَخَٰلَٰتُكُمۡ وَبَنَاتُ ٱلۡأَخِ وَبَنَاتُ ٱلۡأُخۡتِ وَأُمَّهَٰتُكُمُ ٱلَّٰتِيٓ أَرۡضَعۡنَكُمۡ وَأَخَوَٰتُكُم مِّنَ ٱلرَّضَٰعَةِ وَأُمَّهَٰتُ نِسَآئِكُمۡ وَرَبَٰٓئِبُكُمُ ٱلَّٰتِي فِي حُجُورِكُم مِّن نِّسَآئِكُمُ ٱلَّٰتِي دَخَلۡتُم بِهِنَّ فَإِن لَّمۡ تَكُونُواْ دَخَلۡتُم بِهِنَّ فَلَا جُنَاحَ عَلَيۡكُمۡ وَحَلَٰٓئِلُ أَبۡنَآئِكُمُ ٱلَّذِينَ مِنۡ أَصۡلَٰبِكُمۡ وَأَن تَجۡمَعُواْ بَيۡنَ ٱلۡأُخۡتَيۡنِ إِلَّا مَا قَدۡ سَلَفَۗ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ كَانَ غَفُورٗا رَّحِيمٗا ٢٣
Forbidden to you are your mothers and your daughters and your sisters and your paternal aunts and your maternal aunts and brother’s daughters and sister’s daughters and your mothers that have suckled you and your foster-sisters and mothers of your wives and your step-daughters who are in your guardianship, (born) of your wives to whom you have gone in, but if you have not gone in to them, there is no blame on you (in marrying them), and the wives of your sons who are of your own loins and that you should have two sisters together, except what has already passed; surely Allah is Forgiving, Merciful. (An-Nisa ; 23).
If we understand the above verse of Quran, then surely, we know, that women who should not be married to men are;
Mother, daughter, sister, aunt from mother, aunt from father, brother’s daughter, sister’s daughter, woman who has breastfed him, daugther of woman who n breastfed him, mother-in-law, stepdaughter if her mother has become a wife and has had sex with her.
Whereas men who cannot be married to women are;