How Much Mahr Should I Ask For
Hi all readers! Are you looking for an explanation of “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for”? If your answer is “Yes”, congratulations! Now you are reading the right article. Why? Because that is what I will explain in this article. As Muslims, we must understand that. That's why I wrote this article. So, you should read it to the end!
Specifically, there are twelve important points about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain in this article. The twelve important things I mean are as follows:
What Is Mahr in Islam?
The first important thing about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” that I will explain now is “what is mahr in Islam?”. I want you to understand that because that is the most basic thing about this discussion that must be well understood.
Before I explain "what is mahr in Islam?", firstly, I want to say that "mahr" is an Arabic term. The writing is الْمَهْرُ. Mahr has another term. The term is Sadaq. The writing is الصَّدَاقُ.
In general, we can understand that mahr is a dowry. Specifically, we can find an explanation of "what is mahr in Islam?" in the explanation below (meaning mahr in Islam):
الصَّدَاقُ أَوِ الْمَهْرُ فِيْ الْفِقْهِ الْإِسْلَامِيُّ هُوَ : مَا يَدْفَعُهُ الزَّوْجُ لِزَوْجَتِهِ بِعَقْدِ الزَّوَاجِ مُعَجَّلاً أَوْ مُؤَجَّلاً
Shadaq or Mahr in Islamic law is something that a husband gives to his wife because of the marriage contract in cash (directly) or in installments.
All readers! If we understand the meaning of mahr in Islam as explained in the two paragraphs above, then we can conclude that mahr is something that a husband gives to his wife during the marriage contract. Something that can be in the form of objects, such as houses, money, cars, clothes and so on, or other things that a wife wants, such as if a wife wants her husband to read the Quran as mahr, and so on. There are many important things about it which I will explain in the next few paragraphs.
That is a brief explanation of "what is mahr in Islam?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
Who Gets Mahr?
The second important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is “who gets mahr?”. I want you to understand that because it is one of the important things about mahr in Islam that some Muslims don't understand very well.
In the previous few paragraphs, I have explained the meaning of mahr in Islam. If we understand that, then we can conclude that the person who must give the dowry is a husband, while the person who must receive the "mahr" is a wife.
So, if you ask me, “who gets mahr?”, then, the answer is a wife; The wife is the person who gets the mahr from her husband when it is because of the marriage contract or because they are both married.
That's a brief explanation of "who gets mahr?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
Types of Mahr in Islam
The third important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is types of mahr in Islam. I want you to understand that because it is one of those things that some Muslims don't understand very well.
In the discussion about "what is mahr in Islam?" I have explained that mahr is something that a husband gives to his wife because of the marriage contract in cash (directly) or indirectly (in installments). So, we can conclude that there are “two types of mahr in Islam”:
Mahr given in cash or in person
What is meant by mahr given in cash or directly is something that is directly given by the husband to his wife right after the marriage contract. This type of mahr is a common type of mahr. The point is that many Muslims do that. I think we all understand that. So, I won't explain much about it here.
Mahr given in installments or indirectly
What is meant by mahr given in installments or indirectly is mahr given by a husband to his wife in installments or indirectly. There are many things that cause a husband to not be able to give "mahr" to his wife directly, such as the husband has not been able to do it, because it was an agreement between the two of them, and so on.
That is a brief explanation of the types of mahr in Islam. As Muslims, we must understand that.
Examples of Mahr in Islam
The fourth important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is examples of mahr in Islam. I want you to understand that because some Muslims don't understand it very well.
In the previous few paragraphs, I have explained that mahr is something that a husband gives to his wife. It can be an object or something the husband must do. So, in general terms, the examples of mahr in Islam are as follows:
Mahr in the form of an object
I think we all understand an example of a mahr in the form of an object. It can be gold, cars, houses, money, insurance, clothes, shoes, and so on. So, if the wife asks for it and the husband is able to give it to her, then the husband must give it as mahr.
Mahr which is something that must be done
Meanwhile, an example of a mahr in the form of something that must be done is something the husband must do as a mahr for his wife. Of course, it must be the request of the wife. One common example of mahr in the form of something to be done is reading the Quran.
That is a brief explanation of examples of mahr in Islam. As Muslims, we must understand that.
Is Mahr a Sunnah?
The fifth important thing about "mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for" which I will explain now is "is mahr sunnah?". I want you to understand that because it is one of the important questions about “mahr in Islam” that some Muslims don't understand very well.
Before I explain the specific answer to this question (is mahr a sunnah?”, I would like to quote a verse from the Quran about mahr in Islam. Take a look at the Quranic verse below:
وَاٰتُوا النِّسَاۤءَ صَدُقٰتِهِنَّ نِحْلَةً ۗ فَاِنْ طِبْنَ لَكُمْ عَنْ شَيْءٍ مِّنْهُ نَفْسًا فَكُلُوْهُ هَنِيْۤـًٔا مَّرِيْۤـًٔا
And give the women [upon marriage] their [bridal] gifts graciously. But if they give up willingly to you anything of it, then take it in satisfaction and ease. (An-Nisa [4]; 4).
All readers! If we understand the Quranic verse above, then we can conclude that mahr in Islam is something that a husband should give to his wife. In other words, mahr is not a sunnah in Islam.
That is a brief explanation of "is mahr a sunnah?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
How Does Mahr Work in Islam?
The sixth important thing about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is “how does mahr work in Islam?”. I want you to understand that because that is one of the important things about our discussion.
If we read some Islamic legal literature on mahr, then we will understand that mahr is not the price of women. So, mahr is not something a husband uses to buy his wife.
In Islam, mahr is something that a husband must give to his wife as a tribute to his wife because she is willing to marry him. Again, "mahr is not something that can be used to buy a wife".
That is a brief explanation of "how does the mahr work in Islam?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
What Is the Reason for Mahr?
The seventh important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is “what is the reason for mahr?”. Specifically, this discussion is a discussion of "why is mahr important in marriage in Islam?"
There are two important things you should understand:
Mahr is not one of the pillars of marriage in Islam
In Islam, there are five pillars of marriage: the man to be married, the woman to be married, the wali (the man from the family of the woman who is to be married who will marry her), two witnesses, ijab-qabul.
Mahr is not a condition of marriage in Islam
In general, the conditions for marriage in Islam are Muslim (male and female to be married are two Muslims), not mahram, not performing Hajj, and not being forced.
Now, “what is the reason for mahr or why is mahr important in marriage in Islam?”
The only answer is because mahr or giving mahr to the wife is the husband's obligation as explained in the Quran which I have quoted. That is the reason for mahr and why it is important in marriage in Islam.
That's a brief explanation of ""what is the reason for mahr?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
Minimum Mahr in Islam
The eighth important thing about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is minimum mahr in Islam. As Muslims, you have to understand that because there are some Muslims who don't understand it very well.
Before I explain more about minimum mahr in Islam, I will quote a hadith related to this discussion. The hadith I mean is as follows:
وَعَنْ عُقْبَةَ بْنِ عَامِرٍ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ قَالَ : قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ : خَيْرُ الصَّدَاقِ أَيْسَرُهُ . أَيْ أَسْهَلُهُ عَلَى الرَّجُلِ
From Uqbah bin Amir radliyallahu anhu, he said, "The Messenger of Allah (Prophet Muhammad) sallallahu alayhi wa sallam said, "The best mahr is the easiest." (meaning: the best mahr is the one that does not trouble men).
So, there is no mathematical standard to determine the minimum mahr in Islam. The best standard of mahr in Islam is a mahr that does not make it difficult for men to pay for it. Of course, that is something subjective. So, ask yourself about the minimum mahr in Islam.
That is a brief explanation of "minimum mahr in Islam". As Muslims, we must understand that.
How to Calculate Mahr in Islam?
The ninth important thing about "mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for" which I will explain now is "how to calculate mahr in Islam?". I want you to understand that because it is one of the things that makes some Muslims confused about which mahr to give to their wives.
In the previous discussion, I have explained that there is no mathematical standard for determining the minimum mahr in Islam. So, if you want to calculate mahr in Islam, then you have to ask your future husband or yourself, whether he or you can afford to give it to you or to your wife. That's the best way to calculate mahr in Islam.
That is a brief explanation of "how to calculate mahr in Islam?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
How Much Mahr Should I Ask For?
The tenth important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is “how much mahr should I ask for?”. This question is specifically for women who are getting married. That is one of the questions that confuses some Muslim women who are getting married.
In the previous few paragraphs, I have explained that the best mahr in Islam is the one that does not trouble men. The point is that men who are about to get married should not be burdened by the mahr that their future wife asks for.
So, if you ask me "how much mahr should I ask for?", then you should ask your future husband about how much mahr he can give you. That's the answer.
That's a brief explanation of “how much mahr should I ask for?”. As Muslims, we must understand that.
When Is Mahr Paid?
The eleventh important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is “when is mahr paid?”. This is one of the important questions that must be well understood by Muslims who are getting married.
In the discussion about "what is mahr in Islam?", I have explained that mahr is something a husband gives to his wife because of the marriage contract in cash (directly) or in installments. So, if you ask me, "when is mahr paid?", then there are two ways to do it:
- Mahr can be paid right after the marriage contract.
- Mahr can be paid in installments.
All this must be with the wife's consent. Why? Because mahr is the right of a wife from her husband.
That's a brief explanation of "when is mahr paid?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
What Did the Prophet Muhammad Say About Mahr?
The twelfth important point about “mahr in Islam and how much mahr should I ask for” which I will explain now is “what did Prophet Muhammad say about mahr?”. I want you to understand that because it is one of the important things for Muslims, so that they know what Prophet Muhammad said about mahr.
If we read some Islamic literature about marriage, then we will find many explanations about "what the Prophet Muhammad said about mahr". Of course, I'm not going to explain all of that here. Now I will only explain two things.
In the previous few paragraphs, I have explained a hadith about the best mahr in Islam. That is one of the things the Prophet Muhammad said about mahr. I'll quote that once again briefly:
خَيْرُ الصَّدَاقِ أَيْسَرُهُ
The best mahr is the easiest.
The second thing about the words of the Prophet Muhammad regarding mahr is as follows:
خَيْرُ النِّكَاحِ أَيْسَرُهُ
The best marriage is the easiest (not burdensome to the person who will marry).
That is a brief explanation of "what did the Prophet Muhammad say about mahr?". As Muslims, we must understand that.
That's a brief explanation of “mahr in Islam and how much bahr should I ask for?” and some important things about it. Do you understand? If you want to ask, please ask!
I think that's enough for this article. Hope it is useful. Amen.
See you again in the next article!
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